Talking to a friend about what I was visualizing

March 27, 2018 (Chapter 12 Navigating Relationships & Chapter 23 Living with a Memory Impairment and Being a Nana in my book)

Last night I was talking on the phone with a very close friend for over forty years. I told her about the visualization about dropping one my granddaughters. I tried to explain it to her like this “it was as if I am seeing a video of something that had already happened or something that could happen in the future.” I told her that I was wide awake while this was happening, but I could see this right in front of me, yet I knew that it wasn't real. I said that I thought that it was my own anxiety playing games with my subconscious and she agreed that was probably what was happening. She was glad that I was able to get through it and her and I were both glad that it is now gone. She listened to me and I think that she said something like, “that must have been scary, but you know that you would never do that. I'm glad that you are feeling better.” Recently, since this vision has gone, I have tried to see it again and I can't see it.

I feel like these thoughts that are in my head are going away and I hope that they will be gone for good! I'm so glad that I think that I have figured out why it was happening and that it seems to have left me. Thank God for that!

Update: Jan. 2019

I saw my neurologist and he asked me how I was doing. I told him about these visions. He thought that it was happening because it was a fear that I had. I told him that I agreed with him.

Update: Feb. 2021 In June 2020, I had another granddaughter and thankfully I have been able to babysit all three of them without any problems. Thankfully, I have not had any of these visions with the new baby.