What I have learned

March 18, 2021

I was diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment in 2005. More than fifteen years later and I have learned quite a lot. I don’t think that this was planned but it happened. I feel that is because it had to. In order to deal with a memory impairment, you need to figure things out as you go along. Unfortunately, there is no guide book to help you. What I have had to figure out is how to lesson my symptoms and how to deal with them when they arrive, especially the fog.

Today I received a survey from Medicare. I know that I have gotten this at least once before and it went into the trash. I opened up the envelope and it was labeled Medicare Experience Survey. I knew what I needed to do with this survey. I noticed that there were many pages and seventy-nine questions! There was also a cover letter that read “this survey takes about fifteen minutes, and your information is kept private by law. Participation is voluntary.” The fact that I picked the same Medicare plan for two years in a row, should tell them that I am happy with this coverage. In my MCI brain, I refer to this as “text overload”. I ripped it up and put it in the trash! I’m so happy that I can do that!

Whether these surveys are easy or hard for me really doesn’t matter. What matters most is the fact that this is not something that I need to do. That means that I can rip it up and throw it in the trash. Filling out this form would most likely add stress to my life. Increased stress usually increased my memory impairment symptoms. That is something that I try to avoid whenever possible. My lack of comprehension makes this a very stressful task.

I know that early on after this diagnosis was made, I would try to fill these out. I thought that was what was expected of me, so I struggled through the task. I don’t think that I realized that I didn’t have to fill these things out. One day I was talking to eighty something year old Mom and I think that I had just gotten another survey in the mail to fill out. I asked her how she is able to fill them out. She told me that she doesn’t fill them out. She just throws them in the trash. Why I hadn’t thought of that is beyond me. All I know is that I follow rules and I must have thought that if a company sent me a survey in the mail, that I was expected to fill it out. My Mom explained to me that she doesn’t fill out any paperwork unless she absolutely has to. From then on, I have taken this approach.

I feel in some way that this gives me my power. The power to decide whether something is worth trying to figure out and when it is not necessary to do so.

UPDATE: April 5, 2021 Today I received another copy of this survey and a letter reminding me to fill it out. It went in the trash! They need to leave me alone!